GED

Day 23--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Wow, I had a really good day today. They already put me in GED classes. I was taking pretests today in Social Studies, Science, and Reading (I got a 530, 530, 620 (it takes 410 to pass, and 800 is the highest)). I think I did pretty well. Most of it was all common sense and reading comprehension. Simple. After class got out I played a lot of pool and won most all my games, I'm getting better!

Then after this GREAT day SOMEONE just had to ruin it. The dorms switch off cleaning Rec each week. Every day it's a different wing. This week the boys in dorm 3 have Rec. And I'm not sure what wing it was but this boy, Evan Vandiver, threw me an attitude when I assigned him a job. He's 19! I asked him to mop the gym floor with two other people and he REFUSED. I didn't ask him to do anything unreasonable. He wanted to clean the weight room but someone was already assigned. I mean, really? If he has just DONE it, without wining,  it could have been finished really quick and simple. Then I ended up being the bad guy. Grrr.

Also, some students were in the weight room earlier, not working out just flirting with some of the girls who were clearly just messing around.  I told them plain and simple that the weight room was for people who meant to work out, and others may need to use the equipment. I asked them to leave if they weren't going to be using it and they didn't of course. After 15 min I got staff and they said they didn't know I was a Rec Leader. I call BS. But I ended being the bad guy (of course) and they all stormed out giving me dirty looks. It's not like they got into trouble. SIGH. Comes with the territory I suppose.

Class

Day 22-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


I'm sitting in class right now. blah. I wanted to see how long I could blog until the teacher Ms. Julie. Don't worry she won't mind. I don't have anything to do right now so this is kind of free time.

I was way too swamped to write yesterday. Mondays are usually like that. With all the cleaning we have to do, and we have to stay in our rooms. Even if our room is shiny we can't leave until we are excused.

I have decided I don't really like education. I really feel like I'm wasting my time. It makes me wonder what they think they are helping me learn here. I don't see any social skills or studies involved in these assignments. The past three class days (Thurs, Mon, Tues) we've been doing power point presentations in drugs, STDs and, birth control. Three days?? What is going on? How is this going to help me here or on the outside? Urg.

Home

Day 20-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Being here... it breaks my heart. I want to go home. I miss the trees and the water and the mountains. I miss my pets, and Lance, Linda and Colton, and Mom and John, and my grandparents. I miss the pond and the cabin. I miss my friends and lifted trucks. I miss beer and late nights. I don't want to be here anymore. The girls don't like me, but the staff and all the guyslove me. I don't want all this attention. I do well here, but that doesn't mean I like it. There's nothing for me back home... but I miss it anyway. This is the biggest challenge I've ever faced. It doesn't matter how many things from home I bring to place in my room. It just makes it seem even more out of place. I want to lay in bed with my cat and dog. I want to sit on the couch and watch movies with my family. I want to smell lavender and hear the sound of coyotes outside my window at night. I want to swim in the pond and feel the mud between my toes. I want to ride on the back of a horse and feel the wind in my hair and see the ground rush beneath me. I want to be free. I want to go home.

State Fair

Day 18------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------




Today everyone, the ENTIRE campus, got to go to the State Fair held in Yakima. Job Corps paid for dinner coupons and all day ride tickets. I went on this ride that drops you from the sky. I was so freaked out that I screamed all the way down. All my friends thought it was hilarious of course. I also watched the sprint car races. No major crashes, but I still had fun with my redneck buddies. I had a really good day. And I'm VERY glad I didn't have to work or go to school today. I am so ridiculously tired. I fell asleep on the ferris wheel. I'm relieved it's the weekend and I can sleep till noon. I need it. I gotta figure out this time management thing. With being a Rec leader and all its hard. But as soon as it come routine it'll be easier. I should make  myself a schedule. Hey, why did I think of that before? I'll make it... as soon as I have time. *ha*

Well its almost 11pm and I think I'm going to start heading to bed. My eyes are droopy and my head is about to hit the keyboard. Good night everyone.

The Verdict.

Day 17------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Just enough time to tell you what happened today.

So I did what Scott, the HER instructor told me to do. I worked really hard and didn't even quit when we were allowed a break. I was grinding and cutting metal all day. That's hard work. And a LOT of standing. My legs are so tired. I usually slaughter people while playing pool (I'm getting really good) here at Rec (Recreation) but I can hardly stand. Been up late studying too. Just not enough time in the day!

Anyways, Scott pulled me into his office and gave me an evaluation. I got above average in all my work slots and he said, "Get your name on the waiting list. I can only let one 16 year old in this trade per year, so by the time your name comes up, I should be able to get you in here." I was so excited! Whew. Now I get to cross my fingers until then. And STAY FOCUSED. I can't lose sight of my goal. But there's a lot of time between now and then. I think I'll write it down and everyday when I open my closet or something my encouraging memo will be there to remind me. AND, first thing's first, I need to get my GED. I keep forgetting that I'm not finished in that area. Urg I just want to get started! Well, at least I got my foot in the door!!

Hands on in HER (Heavy Equipment Repair)

Day 16-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So HER is what I'm here for, and it's what I've been fighting for for the past 2 weeks. I did my hands on in HER (and of course had an... exchange of words with Scott, the instructor, on my first day), and I LOVED IT! I pretty much crawled into the break panel of a bulldozer got all greasy and covered in oil. I even welded. I Did a lot of heavy lifting and it was perfect.


I stayed afterwards and cleared things up with Scott, I told him that this is REALLY what I wanted, it's what I dreamed about. Scott said that the success rate of 16 year old he accepts into HER is at 0%. I told him that I couldn't say anything that he hadn't heard from every other student trying to get into his class, but I was going to prove to him that just because I'm 16 did not mean that I couldn't handle the responsibility and stress of being dedicated to a trade and the living conditions here at Fort Simcoe. I said that I didn't care how long it took for me to be eligible to graduate, I wouldn't let this go without a fight. He seemed willing to come to a compromise and said that if I worked my ass off while I'm doing hands on in HER and then was did the same in Auto, he would make a few calls and consider it. He promised that he was taking his definite "No" away and replacing it with a "Possibly". It definitely was not a "Yes" but it wasn't a "No". THAT I can work with. :)

Tuesdays / TABE Testing: Part 2

Day 15-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay so Tuesday morning. Wake up at 6am. Get dressed. Breakfast 6:15 to 6:45. Back in the room by 7. Clean my room and bathroom. Take all my sheets and walk ALL the way across campus to Warehouse to get them washed. Walk back. It's 7:40. Clean the dorm. It's now 7:55. I have five minutes to run to class before I get a referral. URG! There's gotta be an easier way. Maybe take my sheets to breakfast and then hit the Warehouse? Well I'll have to try again next week.

I got a job as Recreation Leader. I get first pick on all trips such as white water rafting, movies, rodeos, etc. Awesome huh?

Okay. Now the BIG new you've all been waiting for. I needed to score a 566 on the math TABE test today... I got a 644! I'm the only one in my ICL class that passed both test. And with flying colors! Whew. I'm glad I've got that behind me. Now all I have to do is get my GED and then really get to work!

Mondays / TABE Testing: Part One

Day 14---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today, Monday, was rather hectic. Usually is. It's called detail day; we clean the whole entire dorm till it shines. We wake up at 6am and get dressed, go to breakfast, and clean like usual. The whole center has to be dressed, ready, and in the meeting room at 7:45am. That's where Monday morning meeting takes place where staff and student leaders make weekly announcements. It usually last about 45 min. Afterwards they call students in groups by trade and they line up A-K and L-Z to get paid (bi-weekly). I got a whopping 4 bucks! (Crappy starting pay) Then we go wherever we're supposed to go from whenever the meetings over to 4pm. When we get out at 4, we have account (like a check in, make sure you're not AWOL) at 4:30, then dinner at 5pm. After we're finished eating we have to be back in our dorms by 6 for SST's (Social Skills Training). At 6:30 we have center wide clean up, and at 7 we have and hour and a half to deep clean our rooms. That entitles sweeping, dusting, mopping, scrubbing the shower and toilet and mirrors, and organizing your closet and drawers. Everything needs to be color coded and separated. I have found that if I just keep my room clean and organized ALL THE TIME then there's really little to do and I have free time (even though we aren't allowed out of the room until room check). - And sorry Mom, if I ever move back in, I'm afraid these habits will not carry over. :)  - Anyways, after room check we have half an hour before we are released, and we are put to work, each girl having a different clean up duty in the dorm. I got dusting (pssh, easy). At 9 we can go outside and have to be back in at 10 for another account, bed time at 10:30. Whew! Doesn't give much breathing room.---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We (my ICL brothers, sisters, and I) went to education for the first time today after Monday morning meeting. We took trade placement tests to see where we would be most suited. Of course I scored high on Realistic and Artistic work. So mainly labor, farming, logging, etc/ and singing composing music career. Once we finished that we took placement test to see how educated we were in math and reading. They needed to see which TABE test to give us. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ I'm not sure where I placed in math, we don't take that TABE test until tomorrow. But I DID take the reading test, the highest level, and I needed to score 567 to pass... I got 621!!! I am SO excited. I was really nervous because I haven't seriously studied since the 7th grade, almost 4 yrs ago! I'm glad I got that over with. Now I have to do math... YIKES! Not my greatest subject, never has been. It has been a long time and I have forgotten how to do a lot of the handwritten formulas. But hopefully I'll TABE out anyway and I won't have to worry about it anymore.*Sigh* Well I have to log off now. I have 5 minutes till account and even though I'm in the building, if I'm not in the commons room I'll get counted as AWOL. Not good.-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'll write again tomorrow and tell you how the math test goes. Wish me luck!

Introduction to Center Life

  

It is my 13th day here on center. I'm pretty well adjusted to life here and I've got it down pretty much routine. Very basic. Wake up at 6. Breakfast at 6:15. Back in my room at 6:45. Get dressed, tidy up, do my dorm job, and I'm off to class by 7:30. Class doesn't start until 8:00 but that gives me time to hang out before the long 8 hr day. Class and stuff still isn't too regular. They still have not placed me or my ICL (Introduction to Center Life) brothers and sisters into high school or GED classes. We have to take a TABE test to see if we know basic studies. I believe that starts tomorrow. After we pass (or TABE out as they call it) they will put us into school. I've decided to get my GED classes and then I can get my highschool diploma when I graduate from Job Corps. I only have two years here and I think it's best that I get the most trades I can while I have this opportunity. Many of the students think that 2 years is a long time, and I feel like I've been here forever, but I know that they will fly by. -----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 I came here to this Job Corps to study for my certification in auto mechanics / heavy equipment operating (HEO). Once I arrived I realized that I would be better off taking heavy equipment repair (HER), making me qualified in both operating heavy equip. and repairing diesel motors. Great!... or so I thought. As it turns out you have to be 17 1/2 to be in HER or HEO. I also am not old enough to participate in the fire crew. The center director told me something about a liability issue? What kind of excuse is that? There are plenty of ways around that. Both my parents can sign a waiver that says I may be able to take that class / participate in that activity, and if something were to happen, there would be no legal conflict whatsoever. At Sequim High, they have freshmen, 14 year olds, build cars from the ground up. All students are able to weld and use power saws, no matter how young or old they may be. The local fire dept. has a program called Explorers where young adults ages 16 - 21 are trained to be junior firefighters. They are called out to emergencies and practice with the seasoned firefighters putting out live fires on buildings and cars. They are sent into smokey buildings and high danger situations. Now please, explain to me WHY it is okay there and not here? And WHY, if the staff and counselors knew I would not be able to get into my desired trade, did they encourage me to come here? WHY do they continuously tell students that they believe in equal opportunity, that discrimination is absolutely not tolerated, yet they tell ME that I am not eligible for most of the trades here? THAT IS DISCRIMINATION! I do not have the same opportunity as all the other students. I asked the center director those questions (In front of the whole ICL class, whom all agreed with me), and he looked dumbfounded. Had no other student realized that their rights were being withheld? He told me about this "liability issue" and that the Dept. of Labor decided it. When I retaliated with tears of frustration in my eyes he said, "I can see that you are getting very emotional about this and we will have to get you with a counselor and talk about this situation later."  I was so angry that I told him, "This whole thing is WRONG. Who are YOU to decided what my dreams should and should not be?". He was not very happy with that answer. Later, the center director pulled me into his office and began to speak to me like I was some emotional 16 year old girl, stuck in her own world of overdramatization. He asked me why I had thrown a tantrum and why I had made such a big issue out of nothing. I told him that he and the rest of the staff were being stereotypical. Just because I am 16 and just because I am a young woman, does not mean that my mind is clouded with boys and fairy tales. And it certainly does not mean that I am not mature enough to assess a situation and handle which direction I want my life to go. I explained that I made the decision to come to Job Corps on my own. I did all the research and signed up online myself. No one helped me. I then told him, "I came here because I needed YOUR help. I know what I want in life, but I cannot reach that goal on my own.This is my last chance to make something of myself, I will NOT let you take that away from me." He did not seem pleased that I had made such a statement with such confidence. He probably would have called it defiance. I could tell he was afraid of mutiny...------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

This whole event took place 11 days ago. The center director promised that he would try and work with me and come to a compromise. Nothing has been done. I figure that he has forgotten, decided that would be so angry and frustrated that would just give up and go home, or figured that I will be too distracted by boys and school and drama that I will simply forget about the whole thing. Well he couldn't be more wrong. I may not have gone to school very long but I have had some of the best teachers in the world, my mother, my father, and my grandparents. If I was to let this go I would not be honoring all that they have taught me in the past few years. I have learned to speak up when everyone else is silent, to be brave when everyone else is afraid, to have courage when it seems things have taken a turn for the worse, and to be colorful when the rest of the world is grey. I understand now that I was put here for a reason, and it was to lead and make a path for others. If I don't stand up for myself and other young adults like me, who will?------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Within the next 47 days they will try to place me into a trade that I am eligible for. Key word: TRY. They underestimate me. I refuse to be lead with the others like a flock of sheep. As my grandfather always says, I've always danced to the tune of a fiddler a little different than everyone else. And believe me, they're going to have a hell of a time getting me to dance with everyone else. I know my rights, they will be honored, and I WILL be heard.