October Graduation

Day 39-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They had seven students that walked to get their diplomas  / certification today. A lot of them left right after the ceremony. Many tears were shed, but I personally did not cry because I feel I still have not earned the right to. I haven't been here long enough to really grow strong bonds with anyone.

I wonder if I am even able to. I mean there isn't really anyone back home (besides my family) that I miss. I spent my whole childhood and part of my teenage years in Sequim! I've known some people for years back home, but I don't necessarily miss them. There's very few people who have touched my heart so deeply that I tear up when I think about them.

All the students keep saying I have a "wall" put up. What reason do I have to be defensive? And they tell me that I'm so hard to read, but I'm not hiding anything. Well not really. I don't talk about my past much and I don't ask anyone about theirs. We figure all ended up and Job Corps because we all went through a period in our life that opened our eyes to the bigger picture. We can only see life through our own eyes and all that we have experienced, we have interpreted in our own unique way, and it has made each and everyone of us into the individual we are today. What may seem like a dramatic eye opener to one person, may be a ridiculous sob story to another.

Seeing those students walk today made me excited to see how much I can accomplish in the 2 years of my life. When you go back, and you actually take the time to account for all the happenings and events in your life, whether they be big or small, and put them on paper, it's shocking to realize just how much you've been through. It's stunning how much you have grown, developed, and learned a new part of your Self, how much that you have to offer to the world around you, and sometimes it's hard to believe why you couldn't understand what you have come to accept today.

Sorry that I may be rambling. But those are the thoughts that I have been pondering for a while. Maybe they are words of wisdom gifted to me by God. He's helped me a lot recently. Nothing is coincidental. Everything that happens, happens for a reason. It is the balance of life.

*Pick up the book - Conversations with God, by Neale Donald Walsch